The 8 C’s of Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy
Chart by Julia Summers
Introduction
In the Drop Ins this year we are meeting each month with one of the qualities of Self, as described by Richard Schwartz. February we will look at Curiosity. I thought I’d write a quick summary of the qualities of Self before we start! IFS therapy offers a powerful approach to understanding and healing our inner worlds. At its core, it emphasises the importance of the Self—the core essence of us that is calm, clear, and compassionate, courageous, curious, connected, creative and ✨
What is IFS Therapy?
If you have ever said ‘part of my feels X.. and another part feels Y’ then you are already on the way! We meet your voices/parts and your deeper Self (that place within us which is calm, clear, creative, connected and compassionate), so that we can listen better to them, help them and come into harmony. It’s creative, sometimes fun, really interesting and engaging for most clients, also trauma aware, deep, healing and proven to work.
The founder of IFS therapy, Dr. Richard Schwartz, thought of the mind as an inner family and began applying techniques to individuals that he usually used with families.
The underlying concept of this theory is that we all have several parts living within us that fulfill both healthy and unhealthy roles. Life events or trauma, however, can force us out of those healthy roles into extreme roles.
The good news is that these internal roles are not static and can change with time and work. The goal of IFS therapy is to find your Self and bring all of these parts together.
The 8 C's of Internal Family Systems
The 8 C's of IFS therapy are the key qualities of our core essence, our true Self. Let's explore them! ✨
Curiosity
Curiosity opens the door to understanding, both within ourselves and in our relationships. Instead of reacting defensively, we learn to be curious about our protective parts and our tender inner children. With our natural and inquisitive nature we can explore and maybe uncover the hidden vulnerabilities beneath or behind our intense emotions. Curiosity helps us discover new possibilities for healing and connection. 💡Calm
For many who have experienced trauma, life can feel like a constant state of tension. IFS helps us find a deep, pervasive calm—physically and mentally. When we lead from the Self, we become more resilient, able to ride emotional waves with ease, and return to balance even after emotional storms. 🌊Confidence
The Self brings an air of confidence that reassures our inner protectors. Instead of trying to push away pain, Self validates and comforts our protective parts. As a result, our inner system becomes less reactive, grounded, and able to face life’s challenges with strength. 💪Connectedness
As Einstein once wrote, we are all part of a greater whole. The Self naturally feels this sense of connectedness, drawing us toward others—even those we’ve feared or judged. This deep connection fosters compassion, and a sense of unity with the world around us. 🌍Clarity
When we see through the eyes of our true Self, we perceive situations clearly—free from the distortions of extreme emotions or beliefs. Parts see from their own piece of the pie.. we can see the whole pie.. the totality of the situation.. Clarity helps us understand our experiences, allowing us to see pain and fear for what they are, and recognise the deeper needs beneath them. 👀Creativity
Once we quiet the noise of inner conflict, Self frees our natural creativity. With the space to relax and let go of control, we can think outside the box, solve problems spontaneously, and find innovative solutions that feel deeply satisfying and true. 🎨Courage
While the Self is nurturing and compassionate, it also possesses immense courage. It stands firm against injustice and faces emotional pain without retreating. This courage allows us to confront even our deepest fears and open ourselves to healing, no matter how daunting the journey. We can also meet other’s and their protectors with equanimity and courage. 🦁Compassion
At the heart of IFS is compassion—the innate desire to care for our suffering parts and others. When we separate from the parts that overwhelm us, we can feel compassion not just for our own pain but for the pain of others as well. This self-compassion opens the door to deeper empathy and connection. ❤️
Together, these 8 C's create a pathway to self-awareness, healing, and transformation. They help us lead our inner world with wisdom and grace, while building stronger, more compassionate relationships with others. 🌟
How to Start Your IFS Journey
Getting started with IFS therapy is simple and accessible. You can begin by reading some of the IFS literature, listening to podcasts - for example IFS talks, or watching some youtube talks - I particularly recommend Dick Schwartz, Cece Sykes, Martha Sweezy, Derek Scott amongst others.. and doing some of the wonderful workbooks available. You could also seek out a qualified IFS therapist (check if they have done IFSi or Stepping Stones training, they are supervised and have done their own parts work with a therapist!) who can guide you through the process. Many therapists offer in-person sessions, and if you prefer more flexibility, you can also access IFS therapy online. In addition or as an introduction you’d be very welcome to come along and join us at one of our ‘open’ monthly healing circles. If you're in Gloucestershire, you can also visit it in person.
Whether you choose to meet with a professional, in-person or online therapy, or in a group/community setting, over time, you will gain a deeper understanding of your internal system and how each part contributes to your overall well-being.
The 6 F’s
FIND
FIND the part in, on or around the body. A thought, feeling, impulse, sensation. Who needs your attention right now? Where do you notice it?
FOCUS
Gently FOCUS on where you feel that sensation and observe it. Do any words come to mind? As you focus, how does it feel? Can you describe it? Shift your attention inward - what do you notice?
FLESH IT OUT
FLESH it out. Can you see it? If so, how does it look? If not, how do you experience it? What is that like? How close are you to it?
FEEL TOWARDS
How do you FEEL toward the part? Any answer that is not in the ballpark of the 8 C’s (The qualities of Self-energy: Curiosity, Calm, Clarity, Connectedness, Confidence, Courage, Creativity and Compassion) means that a second part is with us.
beFRIEND
BeFRIEND the part: “How did it get the job?”, “How effective is the job?”, “If it didn’t do this job, what would it rather do?”, “How old is it?”, “How old does it think you are?”, “What else does it want you to know?”
FEARS
What does this part FEAR? What does it want for you? What would happen if it stopped doing the job? This will reveal any lurking polarisation or the exile it protects.
Conclusion
The 8C's FAQs
How does IFS therapy differ from traditional therapies?
Unlike many traditional talk therapies, which focus primarily on conscious thoughts and behaviours, IFS works on all levels - and in a number of different ways, depending on where one is in the flow of the model, with our subconscious internal system of parts - our sensations, feelings and thoughts…. the somatic/sensations in our bodies may be experienced as far back as inutero or preverbal - even generational. Feelings and emotions - most likely experienced in young childhood and have got stuck there since, and also the ‘top’ the thinking, cognitive parts which try and figure it out to feel safe.. We spend time ‘inside’ asking our parts if they are willing to speak with us in some way - almost ‘in the ether’. IFS recognises that emotional pain often manifests as protective parts that need to be befriended, acknowledged and connected with.
Can IFS therapy be done in group settings?
Yes, IFS therapy can be practised in both individual and group settings and can be wonderfully powerful. Group therapy - or healing circles - allow us to share our healing journeys and connect with others, providing a supportive community environment, held in Self energy. Group work helps normalise parts as we witness other people speaking for their parts and it’s fertile ground for immediate access to the parts in us that get triggered by someone in a group setting! Also when secure attachment wasn’t available for us as children, we need to start with finding spaces with others who can facilitate secure inner attachment and relational healing too. My Drop Ins are ‘open’ and we ‘stick with protectors’, to keep the group as safe as possible. So much can be done here, getting to know protectors, witnessing others’ parts, being held in Self energy. Closed groups go deeper, potentially working with the exiles, our tender ones.
How do I find an IFS therapist near me?
You can start by looking for certified IFS therapists in your area, either through professional directories or local therapy practices. Here is the UK IFS Directory https://directory-uk.internalfamilysystemstraining.co.uk/ For those based in the UK, I offer specialised IFS therapy sessions. More information here. However I’m mostly unable to take on new clients… please do come along to our Drop Ins!
What does healing through IFS look like?
Wishing you balance, flow, more self compassion and a more open heart. Healing through IFS involves learning to communicate with the different parts of yourself, addressing trauma, and fostering internal harmony and secure attachment. This process helps us reclaim emotional freedom and develop a new paradigm for living and being with life’s challenges.
How long does IFS therapy take to show results?
The duration of IFS therapy varies depending on our needs and the complexity of the traumatic experiences and attachment injuries we’ve suffered. Trauma has so many layers and it can take a lot of inner connection, lots of patience and a deep felt feeling of safety and containment to get to the deeper layers of our pain and burdens. While some clients may experience noticeable improvements after a few sessions, deeper healing may take months, even years. For some, its enough to work in the upper layers, as internal and relational change is possible quite fast, especially if in the past there has been some safe attachment - or you feel that with your therapist/group. For many others, the deeper layers need time and no urgency, and they are full of psychic jewels, connection and possibility: life is a journey and we’ll always be meeting with new parts or memories, new relational challenges. Connection with the therapist - or the group - and maybe patience, perseverance and maybe even some playfulness are key to the process.
Is IFS therapy suitable for everyone?
IFS therapy can be beneficial for anyone, including those struggling with emotional trauma, anxiety, depression, and other mental health concerns. However, it is important to consult with a trained IFS therapist to determine if this therapeutic approach, this paradigm for living, is right for your unique needs.
For more resources on IFS and its benefits, visit Stroud Therapy’s IFS News Section.